5 years, is a long time, I have come to this blog a few times and never put it on paper. N
ow today. The 8 year Anniversary of Rocky's passing I'm sitting here in Missouri. Its a cold Sunny day and I am home. Quick update. Sold Windy, Went back to college, Got a job, got another job . Windy came back to me. Moved from a farm in Georgia, back to an apt in Springfield, Missouri. Still have Sadie and Windy and a job.. some new grandbabies and a new children( marriage) with one pending. That's about it.
I want to continue the Blog so I am going to just pick up from here.
I moved home. It was time. I can't keep my head in the sand forever and pretend that Missouri isn't home. It is. I loved Georgia, But my home is here and well as many friends. I live far enough away to not have to deal with the past to much. But close enough to continue my proven life long friendships and passions.
It's been a year and half since I have been back. Somethings have I have moved passed. I have worked diligently at creating new memories of favorite pastimes. It's been difficult. It was like ripping off the scar and band aid all in one swoop. Leaving here was important for my mental health, but so was coming back. I had to face it, I had to stand up and say no. Which I did.
So now I am looking forward to some goal setting this year. I have been cleaning out the residual
leftover emotions from my divorce and finally, I am in a place where it doesn't hurt anymore or if it does, I address it and move on.
I am still not dating and probably won't. Between Mike and a really hard try at Keith. I have learned to stand my ground and listen to those voices that say.. " no" and say no. Trust your gut.
So onto those goals.
Windy and I have a hard time spending much time together. Since I live in town and she of course doesn't. Not having her on the farm with me is an adjustment.
But this year, I think we are going to plan for at least one endurance ride.
I need to get my health on track, I have slipped back to old habits. It shows and I feel it.
More outdoor activities. Kayaking has become a favorite and of course hiking , fishing and hunting. Though I pick and choose hunting days a little more selectively. I did manange to get 2 deer for the freezer and a turkey this year. it was about time outdoors, new adventures with new friends and filling my freezer, Trophies aren't in my book for now. I don't have the time to commit to searching for that big deer. I am content to fill my freezer with big fat does and help teach someone new about hunting.
Travel is also in the books for this year. I finally made it to Europe last year. Visiting Germany was a great experience and it had such a familiar and OLD feel to it. Though I was visiting my grandchildren and children I fell in love with the old country and its rich and old history.
I am 3.5 years away from being able to retire from federal service. Then its on to a small place of my own. these are longer term plans.,
For now. Ill sign off. plenty of updates to come.
Sunday, January 20, 2019
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
RED BARN RUN 2014
Windy is in the trailer, I think I'm packed right. I HOPE I AM NOT MISSING anything. Where is her Coggins again? Directions.. I swear we are never going to make it.
Ok. Put the truck in drive. We are on our way my friend. I hope your ready. I'm scared out of my wits.
In my purse is a printed picture of Rocky and I with Hunter in front of Mount Rainer in Washington State. My friend Abby took it. It is one of my favorites. A reminder of dreams and goals and trails completed with friends and with my two favorite men. Many times alone. Views forever etched into my minds eye for me to see and remember.
Windy and I are loaded up and going to our first endurance ride. My trail riding companion Lindsey can't come on this one. Fitting that our first race will be just us..
We arrived at the Camp in plenty of time. Cheryl met me in her 4 wheeler and suggested I park " anywere" while her hand flipped into the air. I picked an open spot between some trees backed in and made sure I wasn't to close to crowd anyone.
I put the truck in Park and set the brake. Took a deep breathe and opened the door. Trying to organize my thoughts, Thinking.. " we are just going camping, relax". I unloaded Windy and fed and watered her tying her to the trailer. She seemed nervous but strangely calm at the same time. She eagerly ate her hay and drank, calling to a few horses and then settling in, Good. Now to go ask some questions.
I asked for a received guidance on were to vet in and when the ride meeting was. Unashamed at being a first time rider and horse. No one gave me any grief and everyone was happy to answer my questions.
I found the vetting area and watched as people vetted in horses. Then went back and got Windy and headed back to the vetting area.
The vets with relaxing charm were glad to offer advice and aid. Lessons I put in my head for later. We passed all A's.. yeah... We went for a short walk. Again, I expected Windy to be her usual excited, nervous self. Yet she wasn't. She was calm and relaxed.
I took her back to the trailer, tied her up and it started to rain. GREAT!!! not really. I fished out her blanket and apologized to her for not having a better set up. I put my tent up in the trailer and then Waited for dinner and the new riders meeting.
The new riders briefing was very detailed and for the first time I relaxed and thought, Maybe I can do this. I swear I committed the entire meeting/briefing to memory. Good thing, I would use all of it the next day. Because I really had NO plan except to trot as much as possible and walk as needed.
The rain continued most of the night, and into early morning. It was cold. I slept on the floor of the trailer inside my tent. Ok really I just laid there. I went through my morning preps in my head a million times.
The morning was upon us and I am not sure I'm ready. I eat , pack my bags, feed, pee and go check in. I have no intention of leaving with the heard. I go back and begin saddling Windy, Taking my time, so I don't forget anything. My neighbor chats me up as we watch the 50 milers leave and then other 25 milers, Now I am excited, But worried. I finish up checking everything and then I walk us both up to the starting area. I get help holding Windy, while I mount as she is as nervous as me and ready to go.
And suddenly we are off!!! I'm really not sure how that even happened. It was a very surreal moment. But we are going down the road at a nice slow trot. I'm stiff and controlled, Windy is great, till the end of camp and a sign stops her in her tracks. I hope this isn't the whole race I mutter under my breathe.
I talk her past it and I feel her settle in and relax. Which relaxes me. We have a couple little spooks but nothing major and we continue on. When she see horses ahead, she picks up her pace just a little and I let her trot as much as I can. There were many beautiful views, Lots of little spooks and some not so little spooks at cardboard cut out people in the middle of the woods. About 5 miles in I get a text from Abby telling me to just ride and relax and that's just what we did. When we came into the vet hold. I explained I was new and asked were and what to do. Windy had walked over a mile in and pulsed in at 43... wow.. I hadn't been riding her very hard apparently. We went to the trailer she ate, drank and I peed and ate. 30 minutes later we were on our way out. Now I am picking up the pace and Windy seems like an old pro, Trotting and even Cantering is some spots. I still worry she is over doing it. But I let her move out more. There are mile markers on the trees So I trot two miles, walk 1. I worry about our time. So I let her move out as much as she wants for the first part of the second loop. When we finally come back to the last mile. I ask her to walk, she begrudgingly obliges me. But would really like to run into camp.. I come in and expect I am late so I proceed to take windy to the trailer. One of the Pulse takers stops me and asks me if she can just check Windy, We still have time to not get a incomplete. So I let her. She is at 60. So we check her in. We FINISHED IN TIME!!! 15 minutes to spare. Had I gone to the trailer, we would have gotten a incomplete. I Hug Windy and my tired defeated face turns to a grin, tears come like sweat and I am angry all in the same minute. I am happy we completed. I am sad to not share it with any of my friends or loved ones except Windy, I miss Rocky and I am angry I allowed anyone, anything to keep me from this moment for so long. I am thankful for the chance to complete a goal! I am thankful to have actually bonded with my Horse during this ride and I am pissed that I once thought that going hunting with mike was more important.
I'm hooked, Windy's hooked and since this day we have done another and improved, both our camping methods and our riding strategy and times. I love camping with her. Her soft nickers when I come out of the trailer or sometimes just stir.. Sound like Rocky when he greeted me. I am her heard now.
During this race as I left out on the second loop I lost a nut that holds my stirrup on. Someone I didn't even know loaned me a stirrup so I could continue.
The people I found her are my people. My village. I can tell. The first time since leaving Missouri, I finally feel at home.
We will be doing much more of this. Windy loves her endurance heard and I love the teamwork between her and I can not WAIT to do the next one.
Ok. Put the truck in drive. We are on our way my friend. I hope your ready. I'm scared out of my wits.
In my purse is a printed picture of Rocky and I with Hunter in front of Mount Rainer in Washington State. My friend Abby took it. It is one of my favorites. A reminder of dreams and goals and trails completed with friends and with my two favorite men. Many times alone. Views forever etched into my minds eye for me to see and remember.
Windy and I are loaded up and going to our first endurance ride. My trail riding companion Lindsey can't come on this one. Fitting that our first race will be just us..
We arrived at the Camp in plenty of time. Cheryl met me in her 4 wheeler and suggested I park " anywere" while her hand flipped into the air. I picked an open spot between some trees backed in and made sure I wasn't to close to crowd anyone.
I put the truck in Park and set the brake. Took a deep breathe and opened the door. Trying to organize my thoughts, Thinking.. " we are just going camping, relax". I unloaded Windy and fed and watered her tying her to the trailer. She seemed nervous but strangely calm at the same time. She eagerly ate her hay and drank, calling to a few horses and then settling in, Good. Now to go ask some questions.
I asked for a received guidance on were to vet in and when the ride meeting was. Unashamed at being a first time rider and horse. No one gave me any grief and everyone was happy to answer my questions.
I found the vetting area and watched as people vetted in horses. Then went back and got Windy and headed back to the vetting area.
The vets with relaxing charm were glad to offer advice and aid. Lessons I put in my head for later. We passed all A's.. yeah... We went for a short walk. Again, I expected Windy to be her usual excited, nervous self. Yet she wasn't. She was calm and relaxed.
I took her back to the trailer, tied her up and it started to rain. GREAT!!! not really. I fished out her blanket and apologized to her for not having a better set up. I put my tent up in the trailer and then Waited for dinner and the new riders meeting.
The new riders briefing was very detailed and for the first time I relaxed and thought, Maybe I can do this. I swear I committed the entire meeting/briefing to memory. Good thing, I would use all of it the next day. Because I really had NO plan except to trot as much as possible and walk as needed.
The rain continued most of the night, and into early morning. It was cold. I slept on the floor of the trailer inside my tent. Ok really I just laid there. I went through my morning preps in my head a million times.
The morning was upon us and I am not sure I'm ready. I eat , pack my bags, feed, pee and go check in. I have no intention of leaving with the heard. I go back and begin saddling Windy, Taking my time, so I don't forget anything. My neighbor chats me up as we watch the 50 milers leave and then other 25 milers, Now I am excited, But worried. I finish up checking everything and then I walk us both up to the starting area. I get help holding Windy, while I mount as she is as nervous as me and ready to go.
And suddenly we are off!!! I'm really not sure how that even happened. It was a very surreal moment. But we are going down the road at a nice slow trot. I'm stiff and controlled, Windy is great, till the end of camp and a sign stops her in her tracks. I hope this isn't the whole race I mutter under my breathe.
I talk her past it and I feel her settle in and relax. Which relaxes me. We have a couple little spooks but nothing major and we continue on. When she see horses ahead, she picks up her pace just a little and I let her trot as much as I can. There were many beautiful views, Lots of little spooks and some not so little spooks at cardboard cut out people in the middle of the woods. About 5 miles in I get a text from Abby telling me to just ride and relax and that's just what we did. When we came into the vet hold. I explained I was new and asked were and what to do. Windy had walked over a mile in and pulsed in at 43... wow.. I hadn't been riding her very hard apparently. We went to the trailer she ate, drank and I peed and ate. 30 minutes later we were on our way out. Now I am picking up the pace and Windy seems like an old pro, Trotting and even Cantering is some spots. I still worry she is over doing it. But I let her move out more. There are mile markers on the trees So I trot two miles, walk 1. I worry about our time. So I let her move out as much as she wants for the first part of the second loop. When we finally come back to the last mile. I ask her to walk, she begrudgingly obliges me. But would really like to run into camp.. I come in and expect I am late so I proceed to take windy to the trailer. One of the Pulse takers stops me and asks me if she can just check Windy, We still have time to not get a incomplete. So I let her. She is at 60. So we check her in. We FINISHED IN TIME!!! 15 minutes to spare. Had I gone to the trailer, we would have gotten a incomplete. I Hug Windy and my tired defeated face turns to a grin, tears come like sweat and I am angry all in the same minute. I am happy we completed. I am sad to not share it with any of my friends or loved ones except Windy, I miss Rocky and I am angry I allowed anyone, anything to keep me from this moment for so long. I am thankful for the chance to complete a goal! I am thankful to have actually bonded with my Horse during this ride and I am pissed that I once thought that going hunting with mike was more important.
I'm hooked, Windy's hooked and since this day we have done another and improved, both our camping methods and our riding strategy and times. I love camping with her. Her soft nickers when I come out of the trailer or sometimes just stir.. Sound like Rocky when he greeted me. I am her heard now.
During this race as I left out on the second loop I lost a nut that holds my stirrup on. Someone I didn't even know loaned me a stirrup so I could continue.
The people I found her are my people. My village. I can tell. The first time since leaving Missouri, I finally feel at home.
We will be doing much more of this. Windy loves her endurance heard and I love the teamwork between her and I can not WAIT to do the next one.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
A RETURN OF SILENCED DREAMS!
With all the new beginnings in my life, one thing has stayed constant. The goal to ride my horse in an endurance ride. It has been a plan since I was first exposed to in back in the early 90's. Cindy, the first mare I considered for this, was sold when The Army moved us from Fort Leonard wood, Missouri to Minot, North Dakota. Life without horses sucked! Then I bought a yearling name Dakota. Ah he was sweet as pie and very easy going. But a quarter horse, more suited to long trail rides. Again there was a near by Endurance race. But my horse was neither ready or old enough.
Moving again to Washington State , I found the horses to be just to risky of a venture on our one income. I ended up selling both my horse and my sons. Then I got a job!!
With my very first paycheck, My friend Abby and I were off to see an older Arabian who shares blood lines with my very first horse. Pagan. We watched as Liz painfully attempted to show us the awesomeness of ROCKY! Abby Picked up right away that he had been trained in Dressage and talked me through some of it. He was 19 and sway back, but he had a heart of gold and he quickly captured my heart. He had many hidden talents. He was a deluxe show horse. He was very well trained and he taught me a great deal over the next year. I taught him about trees, trails, mountains, camping and water.
Again the Endurance bug bit me. This time with my friend Abby encouraging me also. Rocky it seems was a perfect partner. We spend days and hours in the saddle. The plan was set. Then the day before we are to go, he developed a abscess on the cornet band. Disappointed. I settle for being the bus driver to take my friends and horses to the beach to ride. Turns out we would have never made it through the pass to get to the race as it was closed due to a huge snow storm. Soon after Mike came home from deployment and we spent hours trail riding the mountains of Washington, but no more plans were made to do and race before The Army was to move us again back to Missouri. Ah at least I know I can ride the dirt roads at home and refocus. Soon after we got there,I had the opportunity to buy Windy from my best friend so I did. Rocky did not take the move well and even before we had left Washington keeping his weight right had started to be a problem.
He passed the second winter back in Missouri and is buried today behind the house that once was my home. It was the hardest part of leaving that house. Knowing I left him there. I took with me the desire to accomplish what we started out to do. Ride an endurance race to a completion.
I tell you this because I want you to know how much of a dream this has been for me. For 14 years. I have tried to accomplish this. Sometimes life got in the way. But I have learned I often made the choice of being a willing hunting partner to Mike when all I really wished on those amazing days in the woods was to be out riding my horse. I like hunting. But I LOVE RIDING!
I had given up much including my goals to accommodate everyone else. Yep NOT ANY MORE! Even when Mike had come home during his mid tour, the air had changed. I no longer put aside my goals and dreams for his. I hunted with him. But came out to got to the gym everyday. I needed to be strong. So I can complete this goal and that was more important. For his poor self esteem, it was probably the final blow to our marriage. He needs to feel like the important one. least that's my theory. Even through a horrible divorce I never lost sight of my dream again. I will accomplish it.
WE DID ACCOMPLISH IT!
Moving again to Washington State , I found the horses to be just to risky of a venture on our one income. I ended up selling both my horse and my sons. Then I got a job!!
With my very first paycheck, My friend Abby and I were off to see an older Arabian who shares blood lines with my very first horse. Pagan. We watched as Liz painfully attempted to show us the awesomeness of ROCKY! Abby Picked up right away that he had been trained in Dressage and talked me through some of it. He was 19 and sway back, but he had a heart of gold and he quickly captured my heart. He had many hidden talents. He was a deluxe show horse. He was very well trained and he taught me a great deal over the next year. I taught him about trees, trails, mountains, camping and water.
Again the Endurance bug bit me. This time with my friend Abby encouraging me also. Rocky it seems was a perfect partner. We spend days and hours in the saddle. The plan was set. Then the day before we are to go, he developed a abscess on the cornet band. Disappointed. I settle for being the bus driver to take my friends and horses to the beach to ride. Turns out we would have never made it through the pass to get to the race as it was closed due to a huge snow storm. Soon after Mike came home from deployment and we spent hours trail riding the mountains of Washington, but no more plans were made to do and race before The Army was to move us again back to Missouri. Ah at least I know I can ride the dirt roads at home and refocus. Soon after we got there,I had the opportunity to buy Windy from my best friend so I did. Rocky did not take the move well and even before we had left Washington keeping his weight right had started to be a problem.
He passed the second winter back in Missouri and is buried today behind the house that once was my home. It was the hardest part of leaving that house. Knowing I left him there. I took with me the desire to accomplish what we started out to do. Ride an endurance race to a completion.
I tell you this because I want you to know how much of a dream this has been for me. For 14 years. I have tried to accomplish this. Sometimes life got in the way. But I have learned I often made the choice of being a willing hunting partner to Mike when all I really wished on those amazing days in the woods was to be out riding my horse. I like hunting. But I LOVE RIDING!
I had given up much including my goals to accommodate everyone else. Yep NOT ANY MORE! Even when Mike had come home during his mid tour, the air had changed. I no longer put aside my goals and dreams for his. I hunted with him. But came out to got to the gym everyday. I needed to be strong. So I can complete this goal and that was more important. For his poor self esteem, it was probably the final blow to our marriage. He needs to feel like the important one. least that's my theory. Even through a horrible divorce I never lost sight of my dream again. I will accomplish it.
WE DID ACCOMPLISH IT!
Thursday, January 23, 2014
The Longest Trail Ever
So a year has gone by since I wrote here. But there is so much to put here. I don't know were to start. A couple weeks before Valentines Day, an old friend came home. Her name is Hunters Yellow Valentine( Sadie) . One look into here face as she leaped out of the truck window into my arms. Told me all I needed to know. She is almost identical to him in personality and looks. I would have paid the man every penny I had if he would have asked. Fortunately it didn't cost me that much.
Since Christmas, Something had been amiss with Mike, he seemed distant, I was often put on the back burner. I hadn't noticed to much, chalking it up to the stress level of being in charge. He still called me at work. But the conversations were often one sided. I once asked him "what is going on" which I got a short answer. Communication seemed straining on his end.
A trip so see me Girlfriend Abby in Fort Sill over a long a long weekend met with Mikes anger on the phone line as to why I was blowing all his money. I promptly canceled my plans to go to PA to see my daughter off to Afghanistan. I struggled with that until she came home. Praying nothing happened to her. For Mikes sake. Never had he put money above the kids. Weird.
I continue going to Crossfit, 5 days a week seeing improvement in my physical strength daily.
Then right before Valentines Day something is amiss in my marriage and then the dreaded Skype message. Mike asked for a Divorce, Telling me it wasn't about another woman, but that he had been unfaithful twice before. I was to find out later, It was about another woman.
I won't go into to many details here. It is in the past now. But the rug was literally pulled out from under my feet. The man I loved was no where to be found, in his place was a backstabbing liar and cheat. One that didn't even have the respect for our 17 year relationship, friendship to respect my pain. Instead he fed his new found bully with information that was incorrect and some that was very personal and private to her for fuel to push the void between us and attack me mentally. He essentially had her do his dirty work. Down to the finish. Even having her be in court the day it was final which was Nov 15. Opening day of gun season. How perfect. Goes to show you never really know the other person at all.
I know these facts. I was faithful till the end. I never stopped loving him and I never will. But I can never go back to even being friends. I tried. It only causes the pain to continue. I considered ending my life many times and sometimes it still crosses my mind. I got help out of the bottom of the deep black hole from friends and family. But it was by far the hardest I have ever had to fight to continue living. I will NEVER allow someone to have that much control over my life again. I gave everything I could give. I got nothing by heartache in return. I walked away from it all. I refuse to even go back or look back so this is what is in front of me know. It has taken a long painful year to get through this. I am often angry, hurt and sad. But then I stop looking at the door I closed all the way. Mike tried to continue our friendship. I can not. I had to disconnect. I will stay disconnected.
I packed up my Horse, my dog, my life and moved away from everyone I know. My support system, my life for so many years. Its a slap in the face, that it was my dream to stay there , not his and I ended up leaving because its just to painful bare. Even with everyone there to support me. I just couldn't heal.
I know live in Savannah, Georgia. I love it here, its warm , inviting , alive, near the ocean and there are NO memories here to haunt me. It is a clean slate. Exactly what I needed to breath again. BREATHE IN AND OUT! :)
Since Christmas, Something had been amiss with Mike, he seemed distant, I was often put on the back burner. I hadn't noticed to much, chalking it up to the stress level of being in charge. He still called me at work. But the conversations were often one sided. I once asked him "what is going on" which I got a short answer. Communication seemed straining on his end.
A trip so see me Girlfriend Abby in Fort Sill over a long a long weekend met with Mikes anger on the phone line as to why I was blowing all his money. I promptly canceled my plans to go to PA to see my daughter off to Afghanistan. I struggled with that until she came home. Praying nothing happened to her. For Mikes sake. Never had he put money above the kids. Weird.
I continue going to Crossfit, 5 days a week seeing improvement in my physical strength daily.
Then right before Valentines Day something is amiss in my marriage and then the dreaded Skype message. Mike asked for a Divorce, Telling me it wasn't about another woman, but that he had been unfaithful twice before. I was to find out later, It was about another woman.
I won't go into to many details here. It is in the past now. But the rug was literally pulled out from under my feet. The man I loved was no where to be found, in his place was a backstabbing liar and cheat. One that didn't even have the respect for our 17 year relationship, friendship to respect my pain. Instead he fed his new found bully with information that was incorrect and some that was very personal and private to her for fuel to push the void between us and attack me mentally. He essentially had her do his dirty work. Down to the finish. Even having her be in court the day it was final which was Nov 15. Opening day of gun season. How perfect. Goes to show you never really know the other person at all.
I know these facts. I was faithful till the end. I never stopped loving him and I never will. But I can never go back to even being friends. I tried. It only causes the pain to continue. I considered ending my life many times and sometimes it still crosses my mind. I got help out of the bottom of the deep black hole from friends and family. But it was by far the hardest I have ever had to fight to continue living. I will NEVER allow someone to have that much control over my life again. I gave everything I could give. I got nothing by heartache in return. I walked away from it all. I refuse to even go back or look back so this is what is in front of me know. It has taken a long painful year to get through this. I am often angry, hurt and sad. But then I stop looking at the door I closed all the way. Mike tried to continue our friendship. I can not. I had to disconnect. I will stay disconnected.
I packed up my Horse, my dog, my life and moved away from everyone I know. My support system, my life for so many years. Its a slap in the face, that it was my dream to stay there , not his and I ended up leaving because its just to painful bare. Even with everyone there to support me. I just couldn't heal.
I know live in Savannah, Georgia. I love it here, its warm , inviting , alive, near the ocean and there are NO memories here to haunt me. It is a clean slate. Exactly what I needed to breath again. BREATHE IN AND OUT! :)
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Shennanigans and Horse Blankets
Brrr. Finally the snow has finally arrived here in Missouri, While winter came in with a bang everywhere else. We have been blessed with some milder weather. Today on the 1st Day of 2013. it was a balmy 26 degrees and not getting warmer. After a brief visit with the horses. I decided its time for blankets, since they are across the street in a 6 acre pasture with little to no shelter.
So I only have one blanket, So before I go to the store and get some new ones. Lets see how it fits. Hilarious. Thunder is as I suspected not going to fit into Rockys' old blanket. He looked like a muscle bound guy in a to small shirt. So off to tack store to buy him a larger blanket. I didn't look over Rockys' blanket to well or I would have bought two.
Returning home. I put Thunders' new blanket on. Perfect. So I put Rockys' on Windy. It fits, she fills it in better then he did. Then I see that the straps are broken. Only One belly strap is still in tack. Great!! So a little bailing twine and we are in business. I will order Windy a new blanket online as soon as I get in the house. The tack store is closed and I won't be able to get back there till the next week.
As I turn to leave, I hear thundering of hooves. I turn around to see Windy Running as hard as she can bucking and kicking . She does this for 3 laps around the fenced acres! Then I remember. She has never had a blanket on. ooops! Thunder is in hot pursuit and all I can do is laugh. Thunders blanket stays on perfectly, Windy's slides just a bit, making it even more aggravation to her.. To which she bucks and kicks and tries to outrun the blanket some more. Well good thing its not a new one. If she is going to wreak it. Let it be that one. After 10 minutes of shenanigans, Windy finally settles down enough I can approach her and tighten up a strap and adjust it so that it doesn't shift on her to much.
I go back to the house and order a a brand new red one that is the same as Thunders. Should be here on Saturday. I'm sure Windy could care less.
The farrier comes on Friday and hopefully footing will be a bit better and we can get some riding in this weekend. As I walk into the house from the truck I notice, Windy standing at the fence watching me. Ah my friend we are about to become life long friends.
So I only have one blanket, So before I go to the store and get some new ones. Lets see how it fits. Hilarious. Thunder is as I suspected not going to fit into Rockys' old blanket. He looked like a muscle bound guy in a to small shirt. So off to tack store to buy him a larger blanket. I didn't look over Rockys' blanket to well or I would have bought two.
Returning home. I put Thunders' new blanket on. Perfect. So I put Rockys' on Windy. It fits, she fills it in better then he did. Then I see that the straps are broken. Only One belly strap is still in tack. Great!! So a little bailing twine and we are in business. I will order Windy a new blanket online as soon as I get in the house. The tack store is closed and I won't be able to get back there till the next week.
As I turn to leave, I hear thundering of hooves. I turn around to see Windy Running as hard as she can bucking and kicking . She does this for 3 laps around the fenced acres! Then I remember. She has never had a blanket on. ooops! Thunder is in hot pursuit and all I can do is laugh. Thunders blanket stays on perfectly, Windy's slides just a bit, making it even more aggravation to her.. To which she bucks and kicks and tries to outrun the blanket some more. Well good thing its not a new one. If she is going to wreak it. Let it be that one. After 10 minutes of shenanigans, Windy finally settles down enough I can approach her and tighten up a strap and adjust it so that it doesn't shift on her to much.
I go back to the house and order a a brand new red one that is the same as Thunders. Should be here on Saturday. I'm sure Windy could care less.
The farrier comes on Friday and hopefully footing will be a bit better and we can get some riding in this weekend. As I walk into the house from the truck I notice, Windy standing at the fence watching me. Ah my friend we are about to become life long friends.
Everyday!
Everyday on my way home from the gym, I swear I write this blog in my head. Everyday, I never seem to get there. But in some small way I am. Since my July!Gasp! post. I have ridden a few times both Windy and Thunder. I am now committed to 5 days a week and a Saturday Yoga class at the Crossfit Gym. My weight has not changed to much since July. My clothing size has. I now can wear a 10-12. I still have weight in my stomach, My diet has been off since November and I have resolved to get it back on track. I have been so hungry and eating all the wrong things. I have played with the same 5 pounds up and down for the last 2 mths. Ever since Mike came home for mid tour.
Mike came home for mid tour, right on time for Deer Season. This was planned. I was excited to share the woods with him and my new fitness level. We hunted all morning, worked out at noon and showered and headed back to the woods. It was great! Exhausting was probably more like it. Bow season I shot and harvested my own deer. Course I needed a flashlight and a sharp Knife. Lucky for me I am friends with the game warden and a quick phone was all I needed. Twice this bow season I had to call. First time wasn't to funny, Being lost in a pine forest with no reference for which way is out is NOT fun. Luckily it was warm and I had food,water and cell phone service. Before he actually drove up. I had already made my way the 300 ft I needed to find my jeep. I could hear the truck and it was all I needed. I know have a compass on my cell phone.
We filled the freezer, No trophy bucks this year, It was over before I knew it and Mike is back in the middle east till June. Thanksgiving was spent at my parents home and they in turn came here for Christmas. But I have not really been in the mood for the seasons. New years found me reading Endurance 101 and in bed asleep before 1030. The house has been quiet with my Mother in law away visiting her family for Christmas.. I don't mind. In fact this is what I needed to reset a bit.
All in all it has been a year, since I started this blog. some of my goals I achieved. I lost weight. 50 pounds to be exact, I have made exercise a habit and get pretty bitchy when I don't get my daily dose. I am healthier, stronger and more driven to keep getting stronger then even last year.
I have started to work on the bond with my horse. She is always the willing partner. I am always not. It is a sterile ride almost always. The sting of the loss of Rocky is still painful sometimes. I talked to him alot during bow season as my stand on the back hill sits within eyesight of his final resting place. He told me I swear..... He was proud of me and that I needed to stop being so afraid of hurting again. Maybe it was a dream during a mid morning nap in the stand. But I see him often in my dreams. I run may hands on his strong neck and get his hugs that only Rocky gives. We talk and I let him know I miss him and no horse will ever take his place. But it is time to move forward with my dreams and goals. If you have never lost a beloved friend you would not know. The grief is always there, just below the surface. There memory goes with you always. So this year in memory of Rocky and Hunter I am going to push forward with my goals. Windy and I are going to ride in an endurance ride. My two beloved trail partners would approve.
Mike came home for mid tour, right on time for Deer Season. This was planned. I was excited to share the woods with him and my new fitness level. We hunted all morning, worked out at noon and showered and headed back to the woods. It was great! Exhausting was probably more like it. Bow season I shot and harvested my own deer. Course I needed a flashlight and a sharp Knife. Lucky for me I am friends with the game warden and a quick phone was all I needed. Twice this bow season I had to call. First time wasn't to funny, Being lost in a pine forest with no reference for which way is out is NOT fun. Luckily it was warm and I had food,water and cell phone service. Before he actually drove up. I had already made my way the 300 ft I needed to find my jeep. I could hear the truck and it was all I needed. I know have a compass on my cell phone.
We filled the freezer, No trophy bucks this year, It was over before I knew it and Mike is back in the middle east till June. Thanksgiving was spent at my parents home and they in turn came here for Christmas. But I have not really been in the mood for the seasons. New years found me reading Endurance 101 and in bed asleep before 1030. The house has been quiet with my Mother in law away visiting her family for Christmas.. I don't mind. In fact this is what I needed to reset a bit.
All in all it has been a year, since I started this blog. some of my goals I achieved. I lost weight. 50 pounds to be exact, I have made exercise a habit and get pretty bitchy when I don't get my daily dose. I am healthier, stronger and more driven to keep getting stronger then even last year.
I have started to work on the bond with my horse. She is always the willing partner. I am always not. It is a sterile ride almost always. The sting of the loss of Rocky is still painful sometimes. I talked to him alot during bow season as my stand on the back hill sits within eyesight of his final resting place. He told me I swear..... He was proud of me and that I needed to stop being so afraid of hurting again. Maybe it was a dream during a mid morning nap in the stand. But I see him often in my dreams. I run may hands on his strong neck and get his hugs that only Rocky gives. We talk and I let him know I miss him and no horse will ever take his place. But it is time to move forward with my dreams and goals. If you have never lost a beloved friend you would not know. The grief is always there, just below the surface. There memory goes with you always. So this year in memory of Rocky and Hunter I am going to push forward with my goals. Windy and I are going to ride in an endurance ride. My two beloved trail partners would approve.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
I DID IT!
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